Words: Chris Booth
Illustration: Danielle Vorster
It’s amazing what love can make you do
There lies her dead body, bloody on the floor. Her sundress wrapping around her like some burial cloth, her forehead torn apart by the bullet shot at point-blank range. What have I done? I know exactly what I have done, I have murdered her in cold blood and she deserved what was coming to her. No, no-one deserves to die like this, no-one. Why did I do it?
I feel burning tears as they roll down my cheeks. I fall to my knees next to her lifeless body and the weapon falls out of my hand and onto the floor with a soft thud. How could I have been so selfish? She should not have died. He deserved to die though. I am happy that he is lying there in the corner, face down. A smile spreads over my face as the memory of his murder flashes before my eyes. He begged me for his life as my gun pressed against his forehead. The sniveling coward even wet himself. The power that I had was the greatest feeling. The utter and absolute power of having control over human life is the most beautiful feeling in the world. This strange new sensation gave me incredible excitement and I couldn’t contain myself, I had to kill him right then and there, pulling the trigger to see his head snap back and blood splatter behind him – one blast from my gun and he dropped to the floor, dead.
But then she walked in, I wasn’t expecting this and out of pure fright I shot her and now she is dead too and it’s entirely my fault. Oh Gosh, she is so beautiful, nothing that beautiful deserves to die. I loved her as she would never know. It’s amazing what love can do – what it can make people do. The voices of love were the ones telling me to kill him.
I pick up her bloody, lifeless body off the floor and hug her tightly, not wanting to let go. I didn’t mean for this to happen. I swear I didn’t but I did mean to murder him. He deserved it beyond anyone else that I have ever hated. He has always made me feel small and insignificant. He also stole the most beautiful thing in the world from me but now I alone have destroyed the only thing that I have ever loved.
The voices. Why did I ever buckle into them? All they have ever done is cause me pain. Stop getting into my mind! Get out! Now! I lay her body down slowly – I can see the tears that I have left on her dress. I slowly reach for the gun and place the end of the cold barrel into my mouth and pull the trigger.